Let’s talk about feelings…again.

I sat down yesterday after writing my previous blog with a mug of hot chocolate and a nice book to soothe my unusually hyper self a thought occurred to me. That there are some people who are actually afraid to express their feelings or show any outward emotion at all. It’s my guess that maybe they feel that if they would show any emotion openly then maybe they might come across as weak or something and maybe people might take advantage of that. So they end up burying their feelings inside which somehow harms them mentally because they cannot let them out, and that can eventually lead to so many complications in their life. Some of them can include lack of proper interactions with people and also neglect of other people’s feelings because they might fail to empathize with them. Let me give an example. Let’s say a certain person, namely Alice, has gone through a really big heartbreak, and Alice is a person who is afraid of showing her emotions and expressing what she feels or is feeling to other people. So she keeps that hurt and heartbreak inside of her. Letting it torment her and hurt her to the extent that she becomes so broken and unable to move on, and she remains stuck in the past not being able to see the other good things going on in her life. Like she refuses to acknowledge the fact that she is hurt or is hurting. Because by acknowledging that, Alice feels that she might be taken as a weak person by people. But I feel that when something bad happens to you, it is better to acknowledge it. Let me give a very common example. Heartbreak. Everyone goes through that at least once in a life time. So i feel that a person should acknowledge the fact that they are hurt, and their heart is broken because the one they loved decided to leave for whatever reasons.  When you acknowledge it, you give yourself permission to grieve and feel it to the last magnitude. You give yourself permission to miss that person, cry over them. Well some people cry, others paint, others write. Everyone has different methods of cooping with disasters. After acknowledging that you are hurt, you are free to move to the next level which is acceptance. You acknowledge the fact that you have to accept that your beloved is no longer in your life and maybe you can never see them again. You acknowledge the fact that their part in your story is over. Once that part is over, you have to acknowledge the fact that you have to let go.  You set them free and kind of erase them from your mind. You stop worrying about them because there is nothing you can do about it and nothing you can do to bring them back. So you let go of everything and forgive them for what they did to you and forgive yourself too. Well, forgiving yourself comes if you were in a toxic relationship. I feel that those are some ways of cooping with hurt and heart-break. It will take time of course, it won’t happen overnight but hey, you have to take it one step at a time because i know it is not easy at all. But feel your emotions, acknowledge them, accept them, then,set them free. Talk about what you are feeling to a close friend or someone you trust or if there is no one in your life that you think will understand you, then visit a professional. Whatever you feel comfortable with. The main thing here is talking about it.By talking about it you let it go, you let it out but if you keep it inside of you then you just end up hurting yourself even more. So the main thing here is acknowledging your feelings and that’s it. No one will think you are weak or whatever it is that you fear being called or branded. I personally think that a person who can fully express themselves without fear of anything because all they want is to be helped, or heard or maybe just because they want to, is a very brave and strong person, and i usually have a lot of respect for them. So please, don’t be afraid to feel because that is what makes you beautifully human and unapologetic-ally you.

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